When the New Year Doesn't Feel Like a Fresh Start

Jan 15

As a way to nourish my body and re-establish healthy eating after the holidays, I recently shared our gut-friendly meal plan. And if I’m being honest—even though I fully intended to be cooking from it by now—I haven’t.

The re-entry from the holidays is still a bit chaotic, and it’s taking me a minute to find my rhythm again.

This past holiday season was a mixed bag of sweet, scary, wonderful, worrisome moments, along with deep gratitude. Right before Christmas, my dad became very sick and spent several days in the hospital. He went from feeling strong and healthy to suddenly weak and unwell, which caused all of us to slow down and become incredibly present with one another.

By the time we left Texas on New Year’s Eve, my dad was walking, laughing, eating, and back to himself and the cancer was shrinking. I left with peace and a full heart.

From Texas, we headed to Tulsa, where we spent several days because my daughter, Malaine, was in a wedding on January 3rd. It was such a gift to reconnect with friends and experience simple joy—especially for the kids.

On the morning of New Year’s Day, sitting quietly in our VRBO, I opened my notebook ready to vision and plan for the year ahead. Instead, I felt completely overwhelmed. My to-do list was louder than my inspiration. I wanted to feel organized and excited, but I felt scattered and unsure where to begin.

So I opened a new Bible in a Year devotional. In Week 1, in Genesis, I was reminded of a God who brings order from chaos, light from darkness, and structure where things feel undone. That was exactly what I needed.

So I started there, in prayer. Not leaning on my own chaotic, distracted, overwhelmed thoughts, but asking God to take the chaos in my mind and turn it into order, because that’s what He does. And He did. The overwhelm lifted. Not perfectly or permanently, but enough for me to breathe, think clearly, and make some progress.

I was reminded that order doesn’t come from doing more; it comes from daily surrender.

When we flew home to Miami Sunday night, life came back quickly—homeschooling, full schedules, and all the normal rhythms. Things still feel messy. I don’t have real groceries yet. I haven’t cooked from meal plans like I love to do. There are unpacked suitcases, laundry from travel, Christmas decorations still waiting to be put away, and to-dos around every corner.

I also haven’t completed my year-end reflection or my Living with Intention workbook yet—and that honestly makes me a little crazy. But I’m reminding myself that these are evergreen tools, meant to be done when there’s space, not by a certain date. So I continue to ask God to bring order—and calm—into each day.

Right now, I’m focusing on good sleep, time outside, movement, and daily surrender. My goal is to live and lead from a place of being renewed, refreshed, inspired, and unafraid.

At this moment, I’m reminding myself:

I am not behind. “Behind” is an illusion.
To manage my expectations and stop comparing where I am to where I think I should be.
That God is steady and strong, especially when I am not.
To keep moving, staying connected, and caring for my body, mind and spirit.

And if you’re reading this thinking, “Me too. I feel behind. I feel out of control. I want order but don’t know where to start,” please know this—you’re not alone in that feeling.

You don’t need a perfect plan. Just the next right step.