Journey XV Week 3
What I've Learned From My Indian Chief

J.R., The Jack Rabbit. Last summer while on my dad's back porch, JR showed up and stopped long enough for me to snap a picture. It had been a long time since I had seen a Jack Rabbit and this moment reminded how incredibly cool they are!

“He didn't tell me how to live; he lived, and let me watch him do it.” — Clarence Budington Kelland

Action: Pay tribute to your father, grandfather and husband. Reflect and share all the ways they impacted your life, make your life better and love you.

I can't explain why, but I just wanted to get away. I needed to get out of my house where there's always a million "to-do's" so I called my dad and made plans for me and Russell to spend the weekend with him and my step-mom, Brenda. My dad lives in Belton, only fifty minutes from our house. Three years ago they completed their home that they had worked on for over ten years and built with their bare hands. It's tucked away, off of a dirt road and surrounded by pecan and oak trees. One of these days we'll hardly be able to see the house because every time a grandchild is born, another oak tree is planted. So far, there's six grandchildren!! There's nothing fancy about their home, rather it's spacious, very comfortable and secluded with wildlife everywhere. From cardinals, painted buntings, hummingbirds, deer, fox, jack rabbits, and road runners, it's a little slice of heaven. What made it most perfect is we spent the majority of our time relaxing on the back patio where there's always a breeze blowing, also causing their flag to patriotically wave. We talked, laughed, and solved the worlds problems. The combination of home cooking, TLC, and plenty of time to relax, the weekend with Dad and Brenda was just what the doctor ordered and ironically enough, it happened to be Father's Day weekend so it was especially perfect for all of us.

During Journey XIV I wrote about my Mom and her eternal optimistic spirit and after spending a weekend with my dad and it being Father's Day, I am compelled to write about him and all he has taught me.

My Dad, while optimistic, is a very practical, simple, and honorable man. When I was younger, I didn't always appreciate his gruff, stern, and tough-loving personality however as an adult I understand and appreciate him perfectly.

My dad was the sixth of seven children. He grew up on a farm where the children were considered farmhands. From milking cows to picking cotton, he did it all. He was also a great athlete, which was his ticket out of the tiny farming community. In fact, I just asked him this weekend how he got "out" because he's the only one of his siblings to get a college degree. His comment was, "I hated picking cotton" (you see....pretty simple). Fortunately, he was able to get an athletic scholarship, graduate from college and join the Navy. He and my Mom married and were stationed in the Philippines for several years before returning to Texas (due to the many bad flight overseas, he still will not fly in an airplane). Upon returning, he began coaching and this is when they had my sister Shonna, and then me.

I am sure that deep down my dad wished he would've had at least one boy, but if that's the case we never knew it. He put our hair up in pony tails and also taught us how to fight....or in his words "protect ourselves." He raised two tom-boys with this motto "I'm mean and tough!" Therefore, when we fell, stumped our toe, or started to cry for any reason, he'd tell his to rub some dirt on it and repeat, "I'm mean and tough" until the tears dried up. Miraculously, it always worked and to this day, the motto is stuck in my head and used very often (and will be passed down to our children). In addition, he of course raised us to love sports. From the time we could walk we were hitting, catching, shooting and throwing balls. Our sports motto was "I'm as good as the best and better than the rest", therefore if we ever doubted ourselves, we'd have to repeat it. This motto is also regularly repeated and used for all life circumstances.

As I wrote in Journey XIV, my dad also was an alcoholic, which caused the break-up of our family when I was in the first grade. Even though my parents could not reconcile, through divine intervention he stopped drinking. The day my mom moved us out, was also the day my dad laid down and took a nap. It was then he was awoken by a voice that said "Donny, this is not the life I have planned for you. If you do not stop drinking you will lose Elaine, Shonna and Neissa forever". It was clear to my dad that this was the voice of God, so he went directly into the kitchen, emptied all of his beer cans and has never had an ounce of liquor since. This was a lonely yet healing time of his life that he read the Bible from cover to cover and our family's life completely changed for the better.

Soon after, he re-met my wonderful Step-Mom, who ironically enough, had dated in college. Within one year they married and we had a big and happy blended family.

I am certainly not going to paint a perfect picture and suggest that being raised by my father was always perfect, fun or easy, because it wasn't. In fact, I often didn't want to be around him and even though I loved him, I didn't always like him. His piercing eyes and stern voice to this day can sends chills down my spine, however I now understand he was raising us to be strong, independent and respectful women.

My dad is like an Indian Chief. He has brownish-red, dark and weathered skin. His hair is silver and his hands are rough, calloused and filled with compassion and love. He puts family and people first and through example and with his words has taught me to:

• Always give more than 100%
• Never Quit
• Have Fun
• Spend Only What You Earn
• Help Others First, Then Yourself
• Have Faith and Do Not Worry
• Love Your Family
• Respect Your Elders
• Believe in Yourself
• Love Your Country

We each have stories about our fathers or important father-figures in our lives and because it being Father's Day, it's the perfect opportunity to reflect and share all of the ways your father has positively affected your life. And, if you're like me, finding the perfect Father's Day Gift is next to impossible, but after watching the video of the week, I think I've found it!

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